Say what?

Is it just me or are you also exhausted by the number of times you have to say something in a day? Like a stuck record, repeating yourself over and over again. To kids that just don’t seem to listen.

Besides the all too common mom phrase “That’s not a good idea”, I have compiled a list of things I find a little shameful to be repeating day in and day out in my crazy circus called home. Maybe shedding some light on the situation will A) help me find better words (and ones that will have a lasting impact) when yelling at my kids and B) remind me that I’ m not alone. Or so I hope.

‘Noah get your feet/bum/willy out of your brothers face!’ (You would be surprised at just how many times a day I have to say this.)

‘Does that table look like a surfboard boy?’

‘Do you want to land up in the hospital?’

‘Please. No balls in the house!’

‘I said no balls in the house!’

‘No you can’t have another snack. Man, do you have worms or something??’

‘That’s it. Time out!’

‘Do you want a hiding?’

‘I mean it boy. Don’t push me.’

‘Last chance.’

‘Stop putting your fingers in your brothers mouth.’

‘Brody isn’t an animal.’

‘The couch is not a jumping castle!’

‘That’s not very funny.’ (Ok it’s a little funny)

‘Brody get off!’ (I have a climber on my hands!)

‘He had it first so give it back. NOW!’

‘I don’t want to hear another peep.’

‘No buts…no….buts. I said no buts.’

‘I’m counting to three. ONE….TWO…. ya you better be coming.’

‘Wipe that smirk off your face. Or I’ll wipe it off for you’

‘Don’t wipe your boogers on your t shirt’.

‘What IS that in your hair?’

‘Don’t come crying to me when you need stitches to sew your head closed.’

‘Ok. That’s it. Today’s play date is cancelled!” (We all know that’s not true. I NEED this play date more than they do)

‘Stop shouting.’

‘Would you like me to do that to you?’

‘Are you crazy??’

‘Its all fun and games ‘til someone gets their eye poked.’

“Put the knife down. SLOWLY” (yes this has happened more than once)

“If I stand on one more toy!”

“Go to your room and think about what you just did’

‘Take your toothbrush out of the toilet!’

‘What are the first two letters of your name? N. O. The answer is NO!’

And Of course these are all followed by the most over used and over rated 5 words in parenting history: “What did I just say?????”

Oh please for the love of sanity, tell me I’m not alone!

BY: LEIGH GEARY

Leigh Geary

Leigh Geary was born and bred in good ol’ Jozi before moving with her family to Cape Town where she continued high school. She went on and studied Foundation Phase teaching and Child Psychology through Damelin while working in the childcare industry as an aupair. She is married and has two energetic little boys, Noah and Brody, who inspire her to record her stories for them as well as bringing moms together through shared experiences on her blog The Mom Diaries.

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